Over the past year, I’ve been challenged a lot. But, through those challenges I’ve learned a lot. As I finish up my junior year of college, I’m expected a lot of the next year. I’m expecting to be pushed and challenged in ways that I haven’t been before. Through these challenges, I must remember to keep my heart focused on Christ, as it is His strength working in me that allows me to achieve. These challenges will ultimately bring growth, but may not seem worth it as I faith them day in and day out. I want to keep up with this blog to record my experiences and what I learn along the year.
This past semester, I struggled greatly with depression. I felt like everything in life kept piling on and piling on and I didn’t have the strength to handle it. In the darkest of days, I tried to muster up all the strength I had and push through completely on my own. I had no time of reflection, and didn’t stop at all to listen to what God was urging me to hear. For months, I tried to go it alone while He was whispering to me that He was with me all along. If I’d been listening, I would have known that I didn’t have the strength, and that my strength instead came from above. If I’d slowed down, I would have realized my own strength wasn’t before I was knee deep in a depression I thought would never end unsure if I’d make it to see March.
Honestly, in the thick of if, those months sucked. Like majorly. But, once I stopped and started listening to God’s voice, I began to learn a lot. So, here’s a list:
- Most importantly, I learned that depression is a real thing that affects me. It isn’t something I can will away.
- Contrary to my belief, I CANNOT go it alone. The Lord desperately craves my dependence on Him, especially in times like this.
- My go go go personality is my downfall. That being said, I ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO create extensive time in my day for reflection on Scripture, prayer and journaling.
Though my struggles with depression was one of the biggest highlights of this semester, I have many other experiences under my belt, many of which I hope to include in this blog.